I was just talking to a friend who is going through a divorce. She chose to leave her husband due to his inability to follow through on his commitment to his personal recovery from sex addiction and substance abuse. His pattern would be one of letting the addiction get the better of him which, in turn, would negatively affect everything in his life. He then would become so beaten he would crawl into a treatment center looking for help. He would come out of rehab with the best intentions and strictly follow a recovery action plan. Eventually, when he started feeling really good and reaping the benefits of recovery, the action plan would slack off. Insidiously, the old behaviors would creep in with the inevitable end would be relapse. The whole cycle would start all over again.
Commitment and re-commitment is the key. It’s the same reason most diets fail. We decide we want to lose weight so we start the diet with the greatest enthusiasm, but eventually the enthusiasm wanes. This is where we are at a crossroad – go on and make this diet a “lifestyle” or take the easy way – the familiar way – and settle.
When working on ourselves, we are never “done.” Yesterday’s recovery won’t count today if we don’t continue the actions that made today’s recovery possible. You know what I mean? Every day we are presented with a choice to re-commit to a positive way of life. Each day is a crossroad.
It’s not easy to always make the right choices. That’s why surrounding ourselves with positive allies is essential. When it gets too hard, we call on our allies to cheer us on. We don’t want friends that will join us in our “pity party.” We want friends who can lovingly remind us of our inherent value and our commitment to growth. Of course, this is a two way street. The same friend who talked you off the ledge today may be talking you off the ledge tomorrow. We can have bad days, just as long are we are always moving in the right direction.
Thankfully, we who are seeking happiness and a positive way of life have many resources from which to draw inspiration. We don’t have to “make it up” or come up with a whole new plan on our own. Many people have died miserable that way – too proud to take direction or ask for help. Here’s where we practice humility. We know that Albert Einstein did not come up with the Theory of Relativity in a vacuum – he drew on all the scientific discoveries and knowledge that came before him. Similarly, we can draw on all the knowledge of the spiritual seekers who came before us. You see, there are spiritual laws of the universe just like there are laws of physics. Water will always freeze at 32 degrees and happiness is a choice we make every day.
Here’s some tips from Anne Naylor writing for the Huffington Post: Read more... (1310 words, 9 images, estimated 5:14 mins reading time)
